My Little Boy?

King and I went on a double date last night with our good friends John and Joyce. The plan was to meet them inside the mall to have dinner and watch Iron Man 3, which was completely awesome by the way, and I don’t think anyone can play Iron Man better than Robert Downey, Jr! We love love loved it!

Anyway, as we entered the mall holding hands, King paused, tugging my hand, telling me that the laces on his left shoe had come undone. Knowing that he couldn’t bend down to do it himself because of his back (we are being careful not to overwork it since his slipped disc in 2011), I handed him my phone, set my bag down on the floor, and got down on one knee to tie it for him.

It wasn’t a big deal since I’ve done it before in public, but this time, King saw some girls’ reactions as they witnessed the whole thing. They couldn’t help but react, saying “Nye!” (Filipino way of saying What?! What the?!) and giggling. King felt a little embarrassed and we had a good laugh out of it.

I can just imagine what was running through their minds. I looked like a mommy tying shoe laces for her little boy! King looks like a normal, healthy man, and if you’re not “in the know,” then you would never think of any reason he wouldn’t be able to tie his own shoe laces, except maybe that he’s an egotistical, cruel, spoiled boyfriend who just wanted his way. Hahaha.

And who knows who else saw? What if instead of finding it funny, they had made up their minds about King, thinking judgmental thoughts, giving him nasty stares, and muttering disrespectful comments? It’s not like I could explain to everybody around why he couldn’t do it himself.

Just goes to show that we can never assume anything or make conclusions based on what we see. Even when we think we know, we really don’t. We don’t know the back story. We only know what we see, and that’s never enough to size anybody or any situation up.

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Matthew 7:1-2


A Bag of Nuts

Last Thursday, we went to a clinic to get some tests done for Noelle. We need clearance from her pediatrician so we can have her dental procedure done as soon as possible. On the way there, we bought a bag of boiled peanuts. My girls have recently taken a liking to them, though they have always been peanut eaters like me (except when it’s in ice cream or food for Danae). Danae enjoys the fact that she already knows the technique in opening it. Noelle just loves to eat them.

I opened one that had rotten nuts in it, and showed it to the girls to teach them what not to eat. After that, when they’d see a nut shell that didn’t look so good (dark spots, soggy), they’d ask me if it was good or not. I’d always say I didn’t know and that we’d have to open it to see.

I love how ordinary conversations like that give me ideas to learn, to teach, and to share.

Nuts and people are the same. You can’t depend on what you see on the outside to determine if the nut (the actual nut or a person haha) is good or not. You have to see the inside first.

Before you make judgments on anybody because of what they look like, dress like, walk like or talk like, give them a chance. Talk to them. Spend time with them. Get to know them. It may take some effort, but you might be surprised by what you will find when you “open” them up. You might actually gain a new friend, and you might learn a thing or two.

They say don’t judge a book by its cover. I say don’t judge a nut by its shell. 🙂