Our daughters love to talk. They ask a lot of questions. And though it’s overwhelming at times, with the three of them always having something to say (poor daddy 😂), I so appreciate and enjoy our conversations.
A few weeks ago, they asked about our past relationships. Some were easy to answer, some were not. I stalled with some, to which one of them said….
It’s okay to tell us, mom. I know you learned from your mistakes and did better.
But you know, I realized something really important at that moment. As good an adage “learn from your mistakes” is, it isn’t enough. It’s good advice. It’s true that we ought to learn from our mistakes. It’s reassuring to know that there is hope, that we can move forward from our failures. But it is not enough.
It wasn’t only because I learned from my mistakes that I decided to wait for the right man and for the right time.
My mindset needed to change. I needed to be taught and I needed to learn, accept, and believe this fundamental truth.
Only Jesus can make me whole.
No man, no human relationship can ever satisfy the longings of my soul. I am secure, only because Jesus knows me fully and accepts and loves me anyway. I am complete because for everything that I lack, only Jesus fills. Everything I am not, only Jesus is.
If it were only about learning from my past mistakes, I still would have been in and out of ungodly relationships, just trying to get better at managing them. Had I not learned to anchor my identity on Jesus, I would have still looked for happiness and security in those kinds of relationships. Maybe I would have made improvements on my attitude or my words or my behavior, but I would still not have been convinced to wait for God’s will and timing. Or maybe I would have waited, but only until I found another guy I liked who liked me back.
I can’t thank God enough for the turn-around in my mind and heart. And for discipleship — someone teaching me about Jesus and how to obey Him was key. It led me to not settle for less. To choose to wait for what turned out to be my King in shining armor. 💙
Don’t let anyone capture you with empty philosophies and high-sounding nonsense that come from human thinking and from the spiritual powers of this world, rather than from Christ. For in Christ lives all the fullness of God in a human body. So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority. Colossians 2:8-10 NLT