So I saw some posts on Facebook about this girl who disrespected celebrity mom Bianca Gonzales on social media, by insulting her baby. I didn’t get to read the comment, but the article said that her baby was called negra (dark-skinned) and ugly.

I cannot believe that someone, a woman at that, could say mean things about a baby…A BABY! And I cannot believe that a Filipina would insult another Filipina, A BABY Filipina(!), about her skin color.

Bianca responded graciously in my opinion, and I agree with her. Morena is beautiful! It’s 2016 and it’s high time we own and be proud of our natural Filipina skin tone. We should teach our kids to be comfortable in their own skin by loving them, accepting them, and verbally appreciating their beauty, no matter the color of their skin. I am annoyed by these commercials of whitening this, whitening that. Why do Filipinos want to be white anyway? Or why do beauty lines here in the Philippines keep promoting these products as if to say only being fair-skinned is beautiful?

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I grew up loving swimming and going to the beach. I never cared about getting dark because my cool parents never made it an issue. My mom always told me that caucasians love getting a tan — something I naturally had. When I got a bit older, I did care about how my tan looked. I didn’t like swimming in the pool because the chlorine made my skin look grayish, while the beach gave me a nice brown. I eventually learned to apply beer on my skin so that I would get that beautiful glowing tan afterwards. It stank, but the results were always awesome. I don’t do it anymore because I don’t want my kids to smell and taste the beer, plus I don’t really have time to sunbathe these days haha.

Being a proud morena myself, no way am I going to let my 2 morena daughters (out of 3) buy into the “lighter is more beautiful” nonsense. They tan pretty quickly the way I used to, even with sunblock, and we have never told them to stop swimming or to get out from under the sun because they were getting dark. To rest and not suffer from heat stroke, yes. But never because they were getting “too dark.” Before summer vacation officially started this year, Danae commented that she didn’t want to get dark, but was quick to take it back when I offered her the alternative, which was little or no swimming. Thankfully, she cares more about having fun with her friends than about what her skin looks like haha. About the same time, she told me that she knows somebody who would comment (though I’m sure not insultingly) about her deep tan. I told her to tell the person that she is making good use of the sun and is enjoying summer. She laughed and agreed.

I believe it starts in the home. Our daughters learn their identity from what we their parents teach them. We always remind them that God made them beautiful — all of His creations are beautiful. When they are focused on their looks, we remind them that man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart. We remind them that inner beauty is more important. We remind them that what God thinks is more important than what people think. We tell them that they are princesses, not because they have a tiara on their head or because they have riches or beauty, but, besides being daughters of their daddy King, they are daughters of the King of Kings. They are loved, valued, accepted, and blood-bought!

We pray that our children will not look to the world for their identity, but find it in Jesus Christ. That way, no matter which way the world swings, our kids will remain steadfast and secure, knowing who they are and knowing their God-given calling. No matter what the world thinks or says about them — negra, ugly, stupid, worthless, OR radiant, gorgeous, intelligent, admirable — they will be secure of and be humbled by God’s love for them and they will remain steadfast in their faith.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:14

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:3-4

So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. Galatians 3:26-27

But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God John 1:12 ESV

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About Phoebe Torres-Lucero

I am Phoebe Torres-Lucero, wife of a loving husband & dedicated pastor, King, and mother to three wonderful, smart, active little girls, Danae, Noelle and Gianna. Phoebe means bright and radiant. Torres means towers. Lucero means light. Put together, my name speaks of a tower of bright, radiant light. And that is what I hope to be as I write and share with you some of my experiences, especially on being a mom.

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