There are a few lessons to be learned from our experience yesterday. (Click link for the full story)

>King was calm when he got out of the car. I heard him gently ask the girl if she was okay. He was gentle in speaking with each person concerned, from the witnesses, the neighbor, to the mom. In hindsight, I realize how well he handled all of it. If I were the one driving, I would have freaked out, mad as hell at myself, the situation and everyone else. Yes, I would have felt first before I would have thought. The outcome would have been very different, I imagine. Thank God I wasn’t driving, and I caught myself before I started ranting. IN TENSE SITUATIONS, EVEN AS THE ACCOMPANYING PARTY, WE MUST REMAIN CALM AND USE OUR HEAD.

>King was not and could not have been driving fast given the tight space of where the accident happened. It was not a case of King not seeing the girl cross in front of us because she WASN’T in front of us. She came from the side and hit King’s door. It was clearly not carelessness on our part, but we could not walk away from something like that. We could not walk away from Angel. It did not even cross our minds. We had to take responsibility despite the facts. We just had to do the right thing. PROVING WHO IS RIGHT OR WRONG MATTERS SO MUCH LESS THAN DOING WHAT IS RIGHT.

>”You can’t use that as an excuse. How can a girl hit a car? All expenses should be paid!” I was already starting to get riled up hearing these words from Angel’s mom when she arrived, especially since we did not even think for a second not to take care of the expenses. I actually sort of laughed to myself and told the girls (and myself) to be quiet. I know myself too well. If I start, I may not be able to stop. So I chose not to start. Arguing would have made things worse. It would have made the mom angrier, more defensive, and she would never have accepted anything we had to say. SOMETIMES, IT IS BETTER TO BE QUIET EVEN WHEN WHAT WE WANT TO SAY IS TRUE AND RIGHT.

>Upon talking to the mom, she mentioned that there were a couple of people who kept yakking when she arrived at the scene. She didn’t even know them, but they were telling her to sue us. And to think those people weren’t actually there when it happened! Some people just don’t know that they are not helping, that they are merely adding fuel to the fire. Or maybe some people just want to cause trouble for others. I thank God she did not listen to them, though clearly she was upset with us at first. I thank God she chose to get the facts, instead of letting her emotions rule. Her main concern, she told me, was the welfare of her child. There are many people with different opinions, beliefs, and intentions. WE MUST BE WISE IN CHOOSING WHO WE GIVE OUR EAR TO.

>Even though it was not our fault, I can totally understand why others would immediately think it is. It does sound silly when we say a girl hit our car. How is that even possible? Well, believe it or not, it is. It just goes to show that what we think, based on what makes the most sense, may not actually be correct. IT IS EASY TO ASSUME AND TO JUDGE, BUT YOU REALLY DON’T KNOW MUCH IF YOU WEREN’T ACTUALLY THERE YOURSELF.

>Accidents happen. Nobody ever plans to get into one, but we can certainly plan to somehow prevent them. What happened with Angel just reinforced what we have been teaching our kids. I get graphic when I tell them that disobedience can cost a life. Crossing the street is no joke. Danae already did that once — she refused to hold my hand and she dashed to the other side of the road as a van was slowly approaching. Thankfully, nothing happened, though it was a potentially disastrous scenario. I am sure that Angel and our experience are now ingrained in my girls’ minds, that they will be extra careful around cars and on streets. TEACHING OUR KIDS IS ONLY HALF THE BATTLE, BUT AT LEAST THEY WILL BE BETTER EQUIPPED FOR LIFE.

>I learned later on that their neighbors who helped us was not even close to their family. They only knew Angel because she frequently bought goods from their small store. It was perfect timing that they just happened to pass by on their motorcycle within those ten minutes, and dropped their plans, so they could help Angel out. The witnesses whom Angel was walking behind, willingly recounted the event to the neighbor who stayed with us. It didn’t have to be a “our word vs their word” type of thing. Add to that, King discovered that Angel’s mom is also a Christian! In all of it, God’s grace was evident.  We are completely thankful that DESPITE OUR INABILITY TO COMPREHEND WHY BAD THINGS HAVE TO HAPPEN, WE CAN BE SURE OF GOD’S SOVEREIGNTY AND HIS FAITHFULNESS.

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About Phoebe Torres-Lucero

I am Phoebe Torres-Lucero, wife of a loving husband & dedicated pastor, King, and mother to three wonderful, smart, active little girls, Danae, Noelle and Gianna. Phoebe means bright and radiant. Torres means towers. Lucero means light. Put together, my name speaks of a tower of bright, radiant light. And that is what I hope to be as I write and share with you some of my experiences, especially on being a mom.

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