Promises. We all make them. Hopefully we all try our best to keep them. But did you know that I LOVE YOU is a promise? I speak to youth and singles out there. Did you know that when you say “I love you” to someone, you are promising to love that person forever? Think about it. Going into a relationship, nobody ever says “I love you for now,” “I love you for the next 3 months, but I can’t be sure after that,” or “I love you for as long as I feel this way.”

I guess that’s why there are those afraid to utter these 3 words. It’s a “game-changer” in a casual relationship. Although I do not believe in casual relationships, wherein people just dive into them for the fun of it without really thinking about consequences, I get why they’re not so generous in professing their “love.” It’s because if they do so, it will mean COMMITMENT.

For me though, if you can’t commit to a person for whatever reason (age, distance, family background, season in life, absence of love), you have no business getting into a relationship with him or her.

But what about in the case of those who get swept up by their own emotions and easily confess their love to another?

Boys, when you tell a girl you love her, you are actually making a commitment to love her forever. That’s the very reason King and I, during our courtship, were advised to refrain from saying this to each other, as we were still seeking God regarding the future of our relationship. I advise you the same thing. If you can’t back up your statement with a marriage proposal, then DON’T EVEN SAY IT. If it’s just a case of TIMING, then don’t say it YET.

Why? Simple. You tell a girl you love her, you make a promise, she holds on to the promise. YOU BREAK YOUR PROMISE, YOU BREAK HER HEART.

Girls, I know it’s so special when you hear a boy tell you he loves you, but be discerning. Is it the right time for this? If he’s saying all these things to you so freely without backing it up with anything, you should wonder if he’s mature enough to even get into a relationship, let alone lead you. Are you able to guard your heart when you allow him to be so free with his words and actions? And even if you return the affection, unless it’s a marriage proposal, DON’T SAY IT either!

Why? Simple. You tell a guy you love him, you make a promise, he holds on to your promise. YOU BREAK YOUR PROMISE, YOU BREAK HIS HEART.

Don’t make promises you can’t keep. Contrary to what Peter Parker said, though it was a cool line that elicited excitement from Gwen Stacy and the rest of us, in this case I LOVE YOUS are the worst promises IF you can’t keep them. Because even with the best intentions and even if you have all the right reasons to break the promise, the result is still the same. You defraud and hurt another. DON’T MAKE PROMISES YOU CAN’T KEEP.

Go back to BASICS. Guard your brothers’ and sisters’ hearts by guarding yours. Like I said before, it’s a matter of life and death.

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About Phoebe Torres-Lucero

I am Phoebe Torres-Lucero, wife of a loving husband & dedicated pastor, King, and mother to three wonderful, smart, active little girls, Danae, Noelle and Gianna. Phoebe means bright and radiant. Torres means towers. Lucero means light. Put together, my name speaks of a tower of bright, radiant light. And that is what I hope to be as I write and share with you some of my experiences, especially on being a mom.

20 responses »

  1. eunise says:

    I’m a 19 yr old typical teenager that is learning a lot from your blog! keep ’em coming! ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Hope L. Eisma says:

    ang ganda po, share ko sa mga youth friends ko..

  3. AJD says:

    BOOM. galing. simple yet strong.

  4. king lucero says:

    Great Blog! I think your husband is handsome! ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. Dhang says:

    Learning a lot from this Ms. Phoebe! Girls from my Victory group love it and they learned a lot from it! :)) more!!!

  6. Ria says:

    can i say “I love you” to you Phoebz?!!! hehehe ๐Ÿ™‚ beautiful blog! ๐Ÿ˜€

  7. zhey says:

    Great blog, may I share it?

  8. […] my question is do you really know what love is? You might want to read my wife’s blog about “Love is a commitment”. It means that you are committed to love the person even when there are times you don’t feel […]

  9. Athens says:

    I was struck by this blog especially with the word intention. You may have the best intention, but it is not enough. Love, as one author have said, is a verb. It is an action word, not the definition of the world but the definition set by God, just as Christ have demonstrated his enduring LOVE. Great blog too from Ptr. King!

  10. […] my question is do you really know what love is? You might want to read my wife’s blog about “Love is a commitment”. It means that you are committed to love the person even when there are times you don’t feel […]

  11. bethel cruz says:

    wow!!! i learned a lot. can i share this? ๐Ÿ™‚

  12. Adrian Purificacion says:

    I learned a lot from this! Thanks !!

  13. […] for each other. They will have a difficult time healing from unnecessary heartache caused by broken promises. (Hint, ladies and gentlemen: courtship is not a license for you to let your guard down […]

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