King’s been out of the country for over a week and though the girls and I have been doing okay, it has been tough. For one thing, the girls were sick when he left. There was no question as to him leaving because it wasn’t that bad and frankly, I didn’t even think of it even if Danae got confined. His trip is that important. But taking care of a sick child alone, all the stressing and the juggling, add to that the stress of thinking about my husband’s safety — tough. It’s our first time to be this far apart from each other and this long. The same goes for him and my kids, which is why during the first few, Noelle kept crying for her dad when she’d wake up in the middle of the night. I felt helpless. Prayer was the best thing I could do. Thank God for friends who prayed with us too.

To make matters worse, I could not contact him because his phone was dead. He left his charger here. He was not online either. We only got to communicate on the third night! You can’t imagine my joy when we were able to touch base! But every night since, I would have to wait for him to go online around midnight. I can’t sleep because I wait. I’m grateful for my girls’ busy daytime schedule, but it tires me out too. Waiting up late at night doesn’t help.

I’m happy to hear reports about what King and his team are doing there, but our chats are way too short. He gets in late and is usually tired. Skyping is next to useless because I don’t have a cam and mic. He talks, we type. And the kids can’t wait up for him anyway.

So this is what it feels like to have a long distance relationship. I guess what helps me endure is the fact that he’s coming home in a few days. My hats off to couples who go through this for real, for months or even years at a time. I do not know how they make it work. I don’t think I would be able to survive that kind of life.

Right this minute, I am literally waiting for him to go online. Waiting so I could talk to my best friend, my partner, my leader, my better half. Waiting so I could last another day without him here. Waiting so my love tank can be refilled.

And when he does, I’ll still be waiting. Waiting for him to come home to me.

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About Phoebe Torres-Lucero

I am Phoebe Torres-Lucero, wife of a loving husband & dedicated pastor, King, and mother to three wonderful, smart, active little girls, Danae, Noelle and Gianna. Phoebe means bright and radiant. Torres means towers. Lucero means light. Put together, my name speaks of a tower of bright, radiant light. And that is what I hope to be as I write and share with you some of my experiences, especially on being a mom.

6 responses »

  1. King Lucero says:

    I can’t wait to see you too babe! i totally agree with your blog. You made me cry again. I’m coming home!!!

  2. Jeryl says:

    This is like reading a novel by Mitch Albom or Paulo Coelho. Haha. You’ll be together soon. Countdown and excitement begin. 🙂

  3. mimi rodriguez says:

    hi phoebe,
    of all the blogs you did, this one is related to my present situation.
    let me share to you something….. it’s been four years now (April 29, 2007 to be exact) that my husband left for the states. The first weeks, months and even years, was really hard for me, especially when mico was confined at the hospital for the very first time (the pain mico felt when they injected the needles for his blood sample and dextrose). sobrang nerbyosa ko pa naman. i tried not to show to him how nervous i was while they’re doing that and the fact that i’m also afraid of needles. every single night i cried, i prayed for mico & for my husband’s safety. though he called and ask the condition of mico, pero iba pa din, if he is present. it’s so hard pala when someone left you whom you considers, not only as your husband but as your bestfriend, confidant, and someone who will grant your requests (food for instance) in the middle of the night (naglalambing lang, hehehe).
    i also remembered, mico will woke up in the middle of the night, crying and telling me, he dreamt of his dad and misses him so much. all i can do is to hug and pacify him, telling mico that “daddy is okay, he’ll be home soon, or even ask him, if he wants us to call his dad (using our budget cards) and cover my face coz i’m also crying. that’s why, i’m so thankful we have all technologies available anytime we need. my longingness and sadness lessened, but still we misses him so much. sayang nga, he didn’t hear mico talking like an adult, seeing his kakulitan and dance steps inspired by Michael Jackson (his dad only saw him in video), listening while mico singing his latest favorite songs and many more. he missed his kakulitan days. though, we chat at skype, but it’s different if he witness it on his own. mmmm, it’s too long na pala, sorry for my sentiments…
    i’m feel so blessed kasi everytime i read your blog. sorry if i did not include my comment, but truly you inspired me. just keep on writing. and i thank God we became friends. God bless you and your family more and more. :>

    • phoebelucero says:

      aw mimi, what a strong woman you are. i admire you for that. i cannot do what you’ve been doing for the past 4 years. i feel you, though not to the full extent. i pray for God’s grace to be abundant to you and mico every single day, and for His peace that transcends all understanding to rest in your hearts, knowing that he is taking care of your husband in the US. big hug. 🙂

  4. May Palacpac says:

    I feel you now more than ever, peer. Jay and I were inseperable for years, as in years! We were together in everything….the band, the ministry. He even moved in the same subdivision as my parents back in the days when we weren’t dating yet so we can hang out the whole day together. But we’re learning. For the years to come, at least for about 3-5 years, I have to expect him gone for days at least 3x every summer. Soon, he’d be joining a team for those 10 days mission trips and outreaches while I stay home and make sure the kids are well and happy while their dad pursues his passion for the nations. It’s hard but I’m okay. I want him to do this. We’re learning, I’m learning, one day at a time.

    Glad that your man is now back home with you. I can feel your joy.

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