Oh Motherhood!

Oh motherhood!

“Mooooooommmm?” 

“Heeeeeeelllpppp!”

“Can I have rice please?” When the bowl of rice is an arm’s reach away.

“I can’t find it.” And IT (whatever IT is) is right there in front of her.

“Mommy, look!” “Mom mom, look!” “Mommy, look at me!” All at once.

“Mommy o!” “Mom, she (insert verb) me!”

“Carry!” 

“Only mommy.”

“Stay here, mommy.”

“Don’t go, mommy.”

“Stay with me.” When we’ve been together ALL day, EVERY day.

“I’m scared. Can you come with me?” To the kitchen, in our house.

“Can you feed me?”

“I’m hungry.” After just having a meal.

“I’m thirsty. Can you get me water?” “I want milk.” When you’re already lying in bed.

“Mom? Mom? Mom? (tapping or shaking your arm) Can I (insert verb)? Can I have (insert noun)?” While you’re fast asleep.

“No! Please? 5 more minutes (which always translates to more)?” When you’ve already told them 5 minutes before that we’re leaving in 5 minutes.

“Aww, please mom? Can I just…..? It’s just so and so pesos. But you said….. But we haven’t…. But my friends…..” Negotiation after you’ve already answered their question.

 “I don’t like the rod.” 

“Mom, I don’t get it. Can you help me?” And then she’ll fight with you because she thinks you’re making it harder.

“Can you hold this?” “Can you put it in your bag?” Like the baby isn’t heavy enough.

“Awwwgh….” When you ask them to do you a tiny favor.

“Why me? I didn’t make that mess.”

“I want to buy this.” “I want to get that.” 

“How come he/she (friend or cousin) is allowed?” 

“Can you read with me?” When you’re already so so sleepy.

“Can you make chicken ala king and phoebe for lunch?” When it’s 30 minutes to lunch time.

“Ow, ow, oooooowwwww….” With so much tears and loud crying.

“I don’t want to sleep!”

“I don’t want to take a bath!”

“Waaaiiiit.” After the nth reminder.

“It’s so hard.” “I never get to have any fun!” “It’s always NO.” Sweeping statements of ungratefulness, even after a fun vacation.

“What if someone asks me on a date?”

“I think he has a crush on me.”

“I think he has a crush on ate.”

“He’s cute…..” If only I could put into words the sound of King, loading a shotgun. 😛

 

So many words, so many needs, so many wants, so many delays, so many excuses, so many arguments, so many questions. Mommy this, mommy that. These are the things that make me tired, exasperated, feel pressured, feel frustrated, and feel panicked. And at the same time, these are what make me GRATEFUL for being their mommy.

Motherhood is a joy. Quality and quantity time. Family. Fun. Games. Tickles. Piggy back rides. Laughter. Silliness. Dancing. Food. Trips. Dates. Memories. Service. Car rides. Times of house arrest. Sickness. Errands. Budget concerns. Conflicts of schedule. Conflicts of interest. Clash of personalities. Arguments. Stress. Bonding. Growing together. It’s not always great, but by the grace, love, and redemptive work of God, good always comes out of anything bad. We rest in the promise of God that as we walk in obedience to Him, we will EAT THE FRUIT OF OUR LABOR. The sacrifices we make are worth it. 

Motherhood is a privilege. Secrets. Open and intimate conversations. Inside jokes. Family meetings or one-on-one talks. Sensitive topics. Senseless topics. Friends. Feelings. Hurts. Heart issues. Dreams. Likes and dislikes. Crushes. Movies. Shows. Music. Social Media. Quirks. Habits. We have the opportunity to knit a close relationship with our children. We have the privilege to be part of their lives, to KNOW them, to WATCH them, to LOVE and ENJOY them. 

Motherhood is a stewardship. Teaching. Training. Listening. Learning. Discipline. Teamwork. Character building. Strengths building. Life skills. Discovering and developing talents. Discipleship. Volunteering. Church. Worship. Prayers. Faith. Bible. Wisdom. The Gospel. Loving and honoring God. God gave us captive audiences since our children were conceived in our womb. We have the opportunity to teach, inspire, impart, lead, empower, equip. We need to BE DELIBERATE in using, and not wasting, this opportunity. 

Motherhood is a gift. Smiles. Hugs. Regular kisses. Eskimo kisses. Nguso kisses. Thank yous. I love yous. I miss yous. Sorries. I forgive yous. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. Yes, we have the opportunity to give it to our kids, but we also have the opportunity to receive it from our kids. They not only need us. They love us, despite our failure to love them. They love us, just because we are MOMMY. ❤ ❤ ❤ 

 

16105747_1534537249894298_4836154357441778985_n

I have very few pictures of me with the girls. It’s because I like taking pictures more than being in them. I hate and am not good at taking selfies (self-wes). My phone lacks the space for new pictures. But yeah, I need to be deliberate in having my picture taken with them. ❤ 

Thank you Lord, for making us mothers.

HAPPY MOTHERS’ DAY TO ALL THE MOMMIES OUT THERE! ❤

 

Blessed are all who fear the Lord,

who walk in obedience to him.

You will eat the fruit of your labor;

blessings and prosperity will be yours.

Your wife will be like a fruitful vine

within your house;

your children will be like olive shoots

around your table.

Yes, this will be the blessing

for the man who fears the Lord. PSALM 128:1-4

 

Gianna stories

Gianna likes to join in on conversations she’s not part of. Sometimes, she calls my attention repeatedly so that she can tell me something totally off topic. Or deliver a monologue I can barely understand. Other times, she suddenly gives an answer. “No, it’s not!” “Me!” “What, daddy? What?” “Yeah!”

One of her favorite things to do is to get my playful reaction, “heeeey.” She tells me to say it when she suddenly switches the shower to faucet, or when she quickly sits on my chair when I get up to get something in the kitchen. She smiles or laughs each time. She also sometimes directs us to do certain things, saying “Can you wake up me?” “Can you find me?” “Can you where’s my baby?” “Can you close eyes and surprise?” “Can you dance?”

 

She says the cutest things.

“Can I play my toys?” “I need to take a bath because I need to play my toys!”

When Danae just had her operation, Gianna said “I have an owi too!” So cute how she knows how to use too and oso (also) appropriately.

When she’s excited, she says “I’m so essayted!” Or “osom! (awesome)” or “yesss! (but with lips pursed and mouth rounded)”

She likes to use the lazy boy as a slide — no not below, where we rest our legs, but from the top, where we lean. One time she slid down, looked at me, and said ” Dugen? (do it again)” I said okay, and she said her “yesss” with fists in the air like a strong pose.

One time maybe more than a month ago, she came to me kinda angry. She didn’t give me an answer when I asked why. She was just quiet, lying down beside me. After maybe 2 minutes, she said, “I’m not angry anymore, mommy. I’m happy!” Soooo cute.

Sometimes, she suddenly comes to my room and says things like “I’m going to eat, k?” or “I’ll be back, mommy, k?” or “I’m watching in wowa’s room, k?” So cute the way she says “K?’ with that adorable face.

So funny also when she comes to me, pouting, to tell on her sisters. Sometimes they are legitimate concerns, like “Mommy, she she she grab from me.” Other times, “Mommy, she she she kissed my cheek!”

 

I call Gianna Noelle’s disciple because everything Noelle does, she wants to do. It’s cute because they really have a unique bond as sisters (I call Noelle mommy bird and Gianna baby bird as well heehee). One time, Noelle volunteered to take a bath with Gianna.

Noelle: This must be your most fun bath, Gianna.

Me: You think so? Why?

Noelle: Because of me. I’m the fun.

So true. They have so much fun together, sometimes too much fun, haha. 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

Out of sight, out of mind?

When she’s in the mood to stay put and when she likes her food, Gianna pretty much feeds herself. Obviously, there are spills and messes here and there. When that happens, she calls me to clean it up, or she asks for tissue so she could wipe it. If it’s on the chair (she doesn’t sit on a high chair anymore), she usually waits for me to finish picking up the mess before she sits back down. I noticed that she doesn’t like to SEE the mess in her area. Sometimes she moves her plate or bowl over the spilled rice or what have you, to cover it up.

This happened again recently when some of her milk spilled onto the counter. She called me, but before I wiped it, she was already putting her cup over the spill. I told her that I needed to clean it, because even though she covers it, it’s still messy under there.

Doesn’t that sound so familiar? Out of sight, out of mind? We don’t want to be reminded of our mistakes, our problems, our flaws. And we try so hard to cover it up. We bury ourselves in work, keep ourselves busy. We party to forget. We go on trips to escape. We avoid people who we know are not afraid to ask us how we are. We project a happy front on our social media accounts. Sometimes, we even hide behind ministry or volunteer work. But no matter how hard we try, our issues don’t magically disappear. They’re still there.

I cleaned the countertop and the bottom of Gianna’s cup. Just as she needed me to help her, we need Jesus to help us with our messes. We could go on hiding and covering up our issues, just let it fester deep in our hearts, but is that how we really want to live? We compound our problem, make it harder to get to a solution, and perpetuate more covering up. Not only that, we miss out. We miss out on the beauty of Jesus. He starts with that which no one sees — our heart. He cleans from the inside out. He HEALS from the inside out. With Jesus, we encounter the truth. The truth that we are sinners and that we need Him as our LORD and Savior. That apart from Him, we can do nothing. We learn to surrender to Him. We learn humility. We learn repentance. We seek and receive forgiveness. We experience freedom. We learn obedience and faith. With Jesus we get a new, clean heart. We get a fresh start. We live a FULL life.

Now to be clear, we will still make mistakes. Gianna is a toddler. She will still have accidents. WE are human. We’re still flawed. We still sin. We will have problems. And that is precisely why we need Jesus, not just in the beginning, but every single day of our lives. With Jesus, there’s no more need for hiding or covering up. We just run back to Him each time. TRUTH, REPENTANCE, FAITH. Repeat. With Jesus, we grow with ever-increasing glory. With Jesus, we can face our problems with confidence because we are secure in His love and our hope is in Him.

 

But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:7-9

And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:18

28 Do you not know?
    Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
    and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:28-31

 

Noelle Speaks

When we got home from the hospital, Noelle surprised her sister (and us) with a video. She doesn’t want the video shared, but she gave me permission to share what she said in written form. 🙂

I am really inspired by my sister that she really is…..love. Even though she doesn’t hug me and she doesn’t even kiss me, I still love her. She’s part of my heart. Well, I want her to hear this because I love her so much (about to cry so she stopped the video).

Ate, you are a loving, kind sister. Whenever someone hurts you, I defend you. And even though you don’t defend me, you’re still here (puts her hand on her chest). You’re still my big sis. I pray that you were well when you had your surgery. I’m sorry for all the things that I have done to you, for all the bad things I’ve done to you. Um, if you’re listening, I want to say this. You..are…my….you are a part of my heart. I love you so much ate. Please forgive me for all bad things I’ve done to you and I pray for you that you were okay when you did your surgery, and….. thank you for being my big sister and for always caring for me. And like that time when you were going to (sniff) share the candy with me…. I was like, no it’s fine but you still gave me (sniff, holding back tears). I think you don’t remember this because it was a long long time ago. Sigh. I wanna say this again, you are part of my heart. You are my big sis. I love you and…. makes a heart shape with her hands.  Blows a kiss….I love you. Hugs and kisses by me (flips hair)! I relly really really want to show you that I love you even though I make mistakes and I hit you, I’m sorry. Well I hope it’s not too late to say sorry…….

And I wanna keep on saying this again and again. I love you, you’re a part of my heart. And whenever you you get hurt by someone, I’m like, just come with me. And whenever she cries, I cry. You also inspire me to do like good things, and also you…. when I say to you ate “does this look nice?” and then you’re like you have to change. That’s fine….. because you know, you’re older than me. Whenever you say you’re the boss of me, I don’t like it. But you are older than me, so I don’t consider you as a boss. I consider you as a big sister. I love you. Blows a kiss.

What a sweetheart, my Noelle. She has always had a soft spot for her sisters. God bless her heart. And we continue to pray that she, Danae, and Gianna will have an extraordinary bond as sisters. ❤

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Mommy Writes

Mommy’s turn!

The first time I encountered “it” was when Danae was around 2 years old. She wasn’t in any pain. She was actually just singing her heart out in the shower. I immediately called my aunt, who is a pediatrician, and she confirmed my fears. “It” was a hernia. I instantaneously cried over the phone, knowing that surgery was the only way to fix it. I did not want my baby to have to go through something like that.

But because it never gave her any problems — no pain, no changes in her bodily functions — and because I guess we were foolishly hoping it would resolve on its own, it took us 8 years to finally consult a pedia surgeon. The birth defect (not an injury) needed to be closed so that she could safely do gymnastics and other activities. Though it was not an emergency situation, we wanted it done a.s.a.p.

They humored her request! We joked that we are in the business of making dreams come true. She said, yay! Tomorrow, another dream is coming true. My surgery will be done! 🙂

 

I believe in the Lord’s timing, and I believe that though it seems late, Danae’s surgery was done at the right time. She’s more mature now, and she understands why it was necessary. She has always been brave, but God supplied her with so much courage and grace to endure this. I had to put a brave face on for her the whole time because I am not brave! With so many thoughts entering my head and fears threatening to disable me, I enlisted our family and a lot of friends to pray for and with us. That, and the peace of God that transcends understanding, certainly kept me standing.

There was no question that I would be the one staying with Danae in the hospital, and King would be shuttling back and forth to hospital and home. I’m so thankful that when it comes to family matters like this, it’s never hard for King to ask for a leave. It became a time of bonding for me and Danae. She got to have mommy (and daddy at certain hours) all to herself. I was happy to serve and help her. The two younger ones were safe at home with my mom during the day and with King in the evening.

When it was time to have her IV inserted, she was afraid. My outgoing, brave, confident, independent young lady became a timid, nervous, needy baby who wanted mommy to hug and hold her as they put the needle in. She cried in pain. She cried also through the pesky skin test. I wanted to cry too haha, but I was the adult. I needed to be strong for her. I just kept comforting her, encouraging her. It was late, but when she asked for TV, I obliged. As my mom advised, I helped keep her spirits up.

In the morning, while waiting, the anesthesiologist came in. All this time (I even signed papers to consent to it), we thought she would be given General Anesthesia. They could, but because of the asthma factor, it was more risky having a tube in her throat. Apparently that’s how GA is administered. They put you to sleep and then insert a tube in your throat for the gas to go through. When the anesthesiologist suggested spinal anesthesia, since she is physically big enough for it (he said that she’s big for her age — he should see a lot of her taller friends haha), I was not able to hide my apprehension. That was the same anesthesia I received, giving birth to Gianna. Could my Danae handle that? But the doctor assured us that they would do what we were most comfortable with. Thank God we had time to decide. Thank God King was there. I would never want to make major decisions like that on my own. We agreed that spinal anesthesia was safest for Danae.

About to be wheeled down to the surgery unit. Nervous but still smiling. 🙂

 

As she was being wheeled from her room to the surgery unit, she kept calling me, making sure I was right with her. She wanted me to be the one in the waiting area with her, and in the recovery room afterwards. I asked the anesthesiologist if he could sedate her while still in the waiting area, and he was kind enough to do it. He understood that Danae was nervous about being wheeled into the OR without me. He even agreed with me in prayer when I prayed for Danae while he was putting the sedative in her IV.

About an hour and a half later, surgery was done. I was right outside the door when they called for Lucero. The surgeon met me inside, told me that it took longer than expected because her hernia was so small. She said that small hernias are more dangerous because intestines are more likely to get trapped. God’s grace right there! Nothing of the sort happened to Danae all these years! The surgeon was happy also to say that Danae didn’t even flinch when the spinal anesthesia was given to her. She did great!

When I saw Danae, however, I saw her eyes closed but wet with tears. She kept talking but tears kept running down her cheek. I knew she wasn’t in pain, but I guess she was feeling overwhelmed. She couldn’t stop her tears from falling. I encouraged her to sleep, but she didn’t want to in the first hour. She needed to lay flat on her back for 6 hours. We also needed to wait for the anesthesia to wear off. She was hungry, but she eventually slept. She kept repeating that she was hungry when she would wake up. I would fall in and out of sleep too. At times I’d read. I’d pray for the others who were there in the recovery room. 6 hours is a looooong time to wait on a monobloc chair. But I thank God that because Danae’s a child, she was allowed company.

img_1172

My facebook post 🙂

 

Back in her room, she said she was happy that the surgery is over. Whew, me too!!!! We thanked God for everything. None of it would have been possible without Him. I was happy that the operation was a success, that her vitals were stable the entire time, that there are no complications, and that SHE’S ALIVE. Today, she is recovering very well. Praise God. 🙂

Through the 3 short days, my daughter learned to be more grateful. She thanked me each time I helped her ❤ ❤ ❤ . I don’t think I’ve ever received so many sincere thank yous that are not because of something material. On the way home, during a moment of quiet inside the car, she said “Thank You Lord.” That was probably the most sincere and meaningful prayer of thanks I ever heard her say. Indeed, our whole family thanks You, Lord. ❤

IMG_7522 copy

First steps at home, with Wowa’s walker. 🙂

 

Thank you so much, family and friends, for standing with us in prayer. Thank you for checking on us as well. God bless each of you.

Click here and here for Danae’s take on her experience. 🙂

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
    Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
    I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good!
His faithful love endures forever. PSalm 136:1

But I will restore you to health

and heal your wounds,’

declares the Lord, Jeremiah 30:17a

Move on up!

So this school year was Noelle’s first time to complete a year in regular school. A few years back, she started out Nursery quite well in the pre-school that Danae attended, but after Christmas break, she did not want to go back anymore. She had some trauma from a little boy who found her cute (go figure, haha). I knew she was serious because during their Christmas party, she cried instantly when she saw the boy. She cried so much that she refused to join her class presentation. I guess it stuck to her. She was surprised that break was over and that school was back on. So instead of forcing her, I let her stay home, since we were homeschooling Danae then.

We homeschooled Danae from 1st to 3rd grade, to regroup, and strengthen or rebuild her foundations. We agreed to put Danae in regular school last year after much prayer and deliberation. She was raring to go to Studio 360 (now The Sycamore). We knew we were placing her in a quality, non-traditional, small, Christian school. We knew that character is also the school’s priority, not just academics. We knew she would have good friends and teachers around her. We felt secure partnering with the school in educating her. And most importantly, we were convinced that it was/is best for her. Danae learned and grew so much in school. And she loved it so much that it was no surprise that Noelle followed suit.

The girls recently had their moving up day. We bought new dresses, shoes, and masks (thank you Huang family) because the theme was a masquerade ball. We had their hair done. They put their own makeup (amazing). We knew they were going to have song and dance presentations, most of which I did not get to see as I had to run after and entertain Gianna. What we didn’t expect was Noelle’s numerous awards!

We don’t put pressure on our kids to have awards (but of course now, they’re both more motivated to get them). We do urge them to do their best, and we always remind them that good grades are good but their character is still most important. Their classes are also so small (just 3 kids in her level), we really didn’t think about awards. But how proud were we learning Noelle got the awards for having the highest grades in English, Math, History and Geography, and Science! I mean we were aware that her grades were really high but we didnt expect hers to be the highest. Not a surprise that she didn’t get the Filipino one haha, though her grades are still up there. She also got a character award for creativity in the performing arts, and I guess the highest award called the Sycamore award!

Noelle was so happy!!!! I got a little teary as they enumerated her academic awards haha, when the 2nd graders were acknowledged and awarded. Danae cried when Noelle was later on awarded the Sycamore award. Gianna was just happy to finally get on that stage when we went up for picture taking hahaha (she already disrupted the awarding of one secondary student!). King was beaming. Noelle made us all so proud!

img_1162
We are behind you, Noelle! 🙂

 

This girl…. Sometimes she appears as if she’s not listening. Sometimes she forgets, or deliberately fails to tell us that she has homework despite my nagging. But when we review for exams, she knows her stuff. Very seldom does she ask me for help with homework (this is their training in the Sycamore). She constantly tells me things I do not know. Her teachers always give us good reports about her. The awards were a wonderful surprise. How encouraging to know also that we made a good decision putting her in her school.

I did ask her, after all the excitement, if she thanked Jesus for all her awards. She shook her head. It was a good opportunity to remind her that though she is awesome, none of it would be possible without Jesus. 🙂

 

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:3

For apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:5b

 

 

 

 

 

 

Danae Writes (2)

Surgery Day! – Day 2

This was surgery day. I wasn’t that scared to get my surgery. I was just calm and normal. My schedule was at 9 or 10 am. But I ended up getting it at 12pm, because a man had hernia too. One doctor said that while getting his surgery, they saw something in his hernia that they didn’t expect to see. That was about 9 in the morning. I couldn’t eat, because they don’t want me to throw up after my surgery. While my mom was eating my breakfast I stared at her. I was so hungry!! A while later a boy nurse, ( EEWW!! ) came into the room and said it’s time na ( But in tagalog ). He pushed my rolling bed to the waiting room. When the anesthesiologist came, he said that he had to insert the sedative in my IV already. He said it would hurt a bit and feel hot, and it did. As I said bye to my mom I was already dizzy. I heard nurses say we’ll put this and that, but I couldn’t see them. While I was getting my surgery I had weird dreams. I dreamt of colorful things  and weird animals going through colorful walls. I kinda woke up during the operation, I knew I was awake but couldn’t see. I felt pushing, pulling, and pain in my body, and I think every 5 minutes a machine pumped the BP thing on my arm. I tried opening my eyes while I was sleepy, and all I saw was a big green curtain on my neck, in front of me. But it was hard since the anesthesia was still strong. And I think I heard my anesthesiologist say “Good job, Danae.”  

After the operation I saw my mom and told her all my weird dreams. She told me I was very talkative. I couldn’t lift my legs and I was very hungry. I couldn’t eat for 22 hours!! I cried because some doctors still had to see me and it was already 6 or 7 pm that time. My mom got annoyed a little bit, but she reminded me that it was ok and we would be out in no time. When they brought me to my room, I felt pain. I think it was because there were humps going to my room. AND AT LAST I COULD EAT!! I ate the soup from the hospital and cup noodle soup ( but not the noodles ). A doctor came again to check on me and said that I could eat anything I wanted. Again nurses came in when I was asleep.

Time to go Home!! – Day 3 

At last!! Time to get out of the hospital!! I could finally sit, stand, walk a little. I felt very happy and scared at the same time, but I learned a lot while I was in the hospital. I learned that God is always with you and I learned patience. I learned that because sometimes there are delays and sometimes I feel scared. I am very thankful that my surgery is done! I wanted to walk normally but I knew I couldn’t. I’ll be patient. I’ll wait. I’m excited that I’ll be able to do gymnastics and add to my talents.

On our way home we got some Starbucks.

Hahaha. Disclaimer: I tried to be discreet about eating! I was soooo hungry. She was hungry, too. Worse, breakfast was bacon and egg! I thought I was hiding it well, till she asked me what was for breakfast. But she was mentally and emotionally prepared. I already prepped her the day before, told her that she needed to power through the hunger because they really will not allow her to eat even if she cries. She knew that it was for her own good. 🙂

 

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

Danae Writes (1)

Staying in the Hospital – Day 1

Today I am staying in the hospital. I will be getting my surgery tomorrow. Being in a hospital is quite boring and annoying because I hear a lot of knocks, and different doctors and nurses always go in my room to ask the same questions over and over again. I’m quite scared for the needle they’ll put in me. I haven’t been confined in a long time. It is also a little fun because I get to watch movies and get to do some writing. You know what??!! They don’t allow many things you need in a hospital!! I was shocked when they didn’t allow any extra pillows!! About 3 minutes ago, 2 nurses came. 1 checked my BP and the other set up the nebulizer, and then I nebulized. Tonight (or morning) at 12 am they will insert the needle in me and that’s when I can’t eat anymore. My mom ordered Jollibee for both of us, so that I won’t wake up hungry. I have so many questions to ask!! Like how will I take a bath with the needle in me, what will I feel, or what can I do?? Now I am just missing my BFFFLs Ana, Andrea, Jordyn, Rae Rae, and my Grade 5 girls. I will always remember this verse when I’m scared: 

1 Corinthians 10:31

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all for the glory of God.

 

I just noticed Danae intermittently typing on my laptop. When I learned she was writing about her hospital stay, I encouraged her to finish so that I could post it here. She was asking me months back if she could blog, or be featured in my blog. When she finished, I asked her why she used this verse. She said that it’s because she knows it will hurt, but she’ll do it anyway for the glory of God. That was our memory verse for victory group a few weeks ago. 🙂

DC 2017

The Discipleship Conference 2017, entitled Engage, was a bunch of firsts for us. King was part of the team who handled the conference, so he had to be in MOA Arena a day ahead. That meant I needed my own ride going, which I don’t think I’ve done in terms of big church events, for the past 12 years. That also meant we would not be sitting together because he would be working during the event. Something I haven’t experienced in the past 12 years as well.

We’ve brought the girls to some conferences and convergences when they were younger, but this was a first for Danae, alone with me! We decided to bring her because she was going to be transitioning from Kids Church to Every Nation Campus (youth) soon, and we wanted her to get a vision of what God is doing in and through our movement. I’ve been casting the vision in our victory group (the girls and their friends), that our group is not just so we can learn more about God and grow as Christians, but so that they too can share Jesus to others and lead their own groups one day soon. This was the perfect time and opportunity to help open her eyes more. She was excited that Ptr Steve Murrell was preaching.

It was my first time to Uber! Haha, shallow I know, but I was pretty stoked. We rode with my friend, neighbor, inaanak, and Uber expert, Thine. We sat together as well in the event, along with Thine’s husband, Edrei, who is our (Every Nation Campus) South Hub Leader. I think the fact that they were our seat mates was just perfect.

In our Vios Uber….

Thine: Are you attending Unashamed (Every Nation Campus’ student conference)?

Danae: Yes.

Me: Yeah. But you can’t be alone yet. Either Daddy or Mommy will go with you.

Thine: Who do you want to go with you? Dad or Mom?

Danae: Mom! Coz Daddy will keep talking to people he knows.

Thine and me: Hahaha. (We totally got what she was saying! Our husbands almost always get held up by people who want to talk to them, and our husbands are basically always excited to see and talk to people.)

During the conference….

Edrei: How old are you?

Danae: says age.

Edrei/Thine: Where do you want to attend? Youth or Kids Church?

Danae: Kids Church (me, secretly: awwww, my baby is still a baby, yaaaaay!!! Haha, the struggle is real!)

But really, I love how they were encouraging her that she is an intern (future victory group leader), and that she will be helping them reach out to international students. I’m just being a needy mommy. 😉

A few days before Engage, I told Danae that she will share what she learns from Ptr Steve’s preaching to our victory group. She agreed and took down notes. With some help from me, she was able to download it to her victory group mates.

YOU – together, not alone, we.

ARE – not will be, might be, could be, should be. are. right now.

THE – no plan b. we are it.

SALT – lead others to Jesus. don’t lose your saltiness and cause others to stumble.

of the EARTH – your own community. the unreached in your community.

Jesus’ ministry was out of compassion and was extremely personal.

I can’t remember if this was before or during our victory group meeting that Sunday after Engage….

Noelle: Mom, why is ate (big sister) leading vg again?

Me: Training, love. You are also going to share the Word in vg.

Noelle: What? No!

Me: Yes, love. Remember, you are all going to be doing this one day with your own groups.

Noelle: But…. I don’t listen!

Hahahaha. Even if she’s distracted often, I know she picks up a lot.

What a privilege to witness how the Lord is working in and through our daughters. I pray that they will be as convinced as their Dad and I are of discipleship. That they be willing and eager to be discipled, and that they be willing and eager to make disciples. 🙂

18 Jesus came and told his disciples, “I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth. 19 Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations,[b]baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.20 Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:18-20

37 Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’[e] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[f] Matthew 22:37-39

Let’s Talk About Sex Baby!

When the girls were still little, I dreaded the inevitable sex talk. Because we have girls, the responsibility to teach them is mine. My friends and mentors told me how important it is to educate our own kids about sex by age 9, so that they don’t get misinformed or get wrongly exposed to certain details about sex or how the world perceives it. They recommended a book but I never really got to buying, much less reading it.

For some reason, sex is an attractive word. I say this because each time my girls would see or hear it, they’d ask me what it means. I would always reply that sex means gender, like when we fill up forms, it asks us if we are male or female. Thank God they accepted that answer for a few years haha.

And thank God for His wisdom, guiding us about handling this topic with our daughters when it was time. There were two crucial things I believe, that we did. First was we (or I haha, sometimes it’s awkward for daddy) made sure that it’s an open subject. When they ask, we don’t shoo them or forbid them from asking about it. We treat it as a casual conversation. That way, they won’t be afraid to ask. They may feel awkward at times, but if they know that we, their parents, are not awkward about it, they will feel more free to talk to us. Also, it wasn’t a one time-big time conversation, where we sat them down and formally gave them a lesson. It began with a simple question, which gave us the opportunity to lay down the right foundation regarding sex. The conversation has not ended. But, we are also mindful of their ages, their maturity, and their privacy (what to talk about, when, and around whom).

Second, we made sure that they knew the truth about sex — that it was created by God, and it was created for the husband and wife to enjoy. We believe that beginning with that, our kids have a healthy and godly perspective of sex.

So because sex is a free topic of conversation within our family, I’ve been asked the funniest questions.

Daughter: Mom, what is a condom?

Me: Where’d you hear about that?

Daughter explains. Something about seeing it on Musical.ly and it being blown up like balloons.

Me: (after warning her about being careful of what she watches online) It’s a thing that keeps the sperm from uniting with the egg.

Daughter: (after asking where it’s placed, etc etc) Wait, why would they want to keep the sperm from the egg?

Me: So the mommy won’t get pregnant.

Daughter: Eeeeeew, so you mean people do it just for fun????

Me: Hahaha, yes! God created it for husband and wife to enjoy, remember?

 

Daughter: I know what sex is.

Me: Okay, what is it?

Daughter explains what she learned from her science class.

Me: Yes, that’s right.

Daughter: But how does the sperm meet the egg?

Me: I’ll tell you when you’re older.

Daughter: I know mom.

Me: Okay tell me.

Daughter: The private part of the boy and the private part of the girl.

Me: Okay…..

Daughter: But mom, which private part? Here (pointing to her chest) or here (pointing to her crotch)?

 

Hahahah, I love conversations with our girls! It keeps me on my toes, and keeps me seeking God’s wisdom. I pray for courage, wisdom and discernment when the time comes for you to begin and to continue that conversation with your kids, in Jesus’ name.

 

“But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ 
‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 
and the two will become one flesh.’So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Mark 10:6-9